Sureal moments while watching Gene Simmons Family Jewels

I was watching an epp of Gene Simmons Family Jewels titled "The honeymoon is Over". This epp is the first epp after Gene and Shannon got married. Shannon who I LOVE was cleaning out there garage and she finds some keys under a box of her daughter Sophie's stuff. Shannon gets suspicious immediately because of how Gene has been throughout there 28 year life together, always cheating on her, up until only a few weeks before he married her. After asking Sophie and Nick, her and Gene's children were the keys theres and being told NO, she tried all the cabinets in Gene's shrine of a office and found the keys didn't fit any of the locks in there.

Shannon then goes to Gene and holding the keys up asks are these yours? Gene gets very uncomfortable and after a few moments says Yes they are mine and tells Shannon to sit down. Shannon now is freaking out, he tells her that the keys belong to a safety deposit box he has and inside that box is portfolios of polaroids of naked women he has been with, a LOT of women in all sorts of sexual positions.

Now this is where I have my sureal moment because when I was with Gene he asked to take polaroids of me bending over. I now realise I'm one of the thousands of women he has been hiding in a deposit box in a bank.

Thankfully, Gene has been honest with Shannon and asks Shannon if he goes and gets them she can do whatever she wants with them. We see Gene carrying huge volumes of portfolios back to there house and out into the garden where a fire pit is, Shannon takes 1 page out with neatly comparmentalised polaroids all in a row and neatly stored inbetween plastic and burns it, and then burns the rest of them. The polaroids were blurred so we couldn't see who these women were, but I know I was one of these woman and I also know he takes more than one polaroid of each woman, well he did in my case.

As Shannon said, burning them has not made her feel any better about what Gene has done in his past, she just hopes he never cheats on her again, but when asked by both Gene and Shannon's psych "do you trust him" Shannon said NO.

I think this epp is about a year old and I know they are still together, so I sincerely hope that Gene has stayed true to his word and not cheated on his wife Shannon since they have been married.

My admiration for Mrs Shannon Tweed Simmons has always been great, she is not only beautiful on the outside but sensationally beautiful on the inside. I only watch Family Jewels to see Shannon, Nick, Sophie and there dogs. Gene is nothing more than window dressing.
 

My most embarassing time with The Police (the band) not the cops!

Two of my male friends in the 70's & 80's were Mark Demagio and Gavin Wood. They were in a sense my pimp's. Gavin was a DJ at 3XY and Mark was the Rock writer for the gutter newspaper The Truth. Whenever a overseas band or artist came to town they would let me know so I could see if I wanted to meet them or fcuk them. This story is about The Police via Mark Demgio. Mark was also a rock star he was in the band Town Criers.

Mark rings me and says do you want to meet Willie Nelson. I say WTF "NO"! I wanna meet The Police they were both in town that weekend. Mark says, well I'm supposed to be interviewing them but I can't make it, do you want to go to the press conference. I think, okay this will be fun. Now I thought all press conferences were like the ones on the news, a big room with heaps of journos sitting in chairs firing questions at whoever. WRONG! He tells me it's at The Hilton, just go along and have fun.

So it's Friday night my BFF Chrissy (who is dead now) and I are out on the town. In those days like now you didn't get home from a night out till 8am next morning. So I tell her were going to The Hilton to see The Police. Chrissy was the most adorable girl you could ever meet, she had a cockney accent and would do whatever I told her to do. We were both dressed as band moles, both of us in black leather mini's.

We arrive at The Hilton go to the reception desk, and surprise my friend Glenn Robins (Kath & Kim fame) brother was the Manager their. He sees me coming and says "what are you doing here". I say "I'm here to interview The Police for Truth". He is surprised, but tells me to go to the 10th floor, Room whatever. Off we go. I knock on the door, and oh my god, Michelle from Mushroom opens the door, and just stares at me, and says "what are you doing here", I say, I'm standing in for Mark Demagio, she lets Chrissy and me in.

Now I realise i'm in deep shit. It's not a conference room, but a suite with a spiral staircase in the middle of it and Michael Gudinsky, Barry Bissell, Lee Simon and other legit people are their, and they all know me from the Rock scene not as a journo, so stair at me with daggers in their eyes and I can't escape, so I have to go through with this charade.

Michelle says "which one do you want to interview", (i'm dying inside) she says "do you want Sting", i freak out and say NO! so she says you can do Stuart the drummer. Fuck, I say to Chrissy who is eating everything in sight, get me a piece of paper and pen NOW! and stop bloody eating. I have to ask the drummer a question. What question am I gonna ask. She is hopeless and has no clue, either do I. Now don't forget their is about 20 people in this suite all looking as Chrissy and me with "WTF" looks on their faces. I ask Michelle can I use the phone. I call Mark and whisper, "I have to interview one of the Police, what quesion can I ask", he is pissing himself laughing and says "ask them if they fuck on tour" I hang up on him. Now i'm in panick mode, but can't let anyone know I'm dying inside. Chrissy gets me paper and pen, from where I have no idea. At least I look like I know what I'm doing. Still don't have a question.

Sting, Stuart, and Andy come down the spiral staircase. Sting is a clown and is throwing himself on the couch then throwing himself off the couch, he was hysterical. Andy comes straight up to me and askes me out, now Andy is short and has a big mole on his face, which I can't stop looking at. I say NO! i'm on a job here. Stuart sits on another couch, he is he quiet one. I think of a great question. Michelle introduces me to Stuart who looks at me in a perplexed way. I sit down, now all the legit journos are 1 foot away from us, standing behind the couch.

Stuart says "hi" and askes which paper I'm from, i say The Truth, and ask my question. I say "when can we expect another album from the band"? he starts to answer, and I can't contain myself, because I'm such an honest person, I have to tell him the truth. As he is answering I grab his arm and say, "look i'm not really from The Truth and i'm not a journo" he looked at me with this shocked look and said "What?" in a loud scream, everyone is now looking at us, he is disgusted, so I apologise and get up with as much dignity as I can muster and let the next journo take my place. Now I'm standing behind the couch while a journo is asking Stuart his question, I'm pretending to write something on my little bit of paper, Stuart is staring at me in disbelief. Fuck now I don't know how to get the fuck out of this embarassing situation. Michelle comes over and says "what is going on" I say "nothing, but I have to go and get the story to press". I grab Chrissy and we get the hell out of their.

It's 10am now, we go to reception and go to the bar at the Hilton, order a drink, and collapse laughing. But the story dosen't end their.

My long time boyfriend Pierre owned Jeanmakers at 501 Chapel Street. He makes made to mesasure Moleskins and recycled jeans for visiting Rock Gods/celebrities, and of course the general public. The Police are taken their by their management the next week to get some clothes. Pierre says to Stuart, "oh you met my lady" Stuart says "oh! I did where" Pierre says "she was the lady who interviewed you for The Truth", Stuart starts bursting out laughing and says "that was the funniest and most surprising thing that has ever happened to me on tour". I'm soo happy now, I thought he hated me, but he was in shock just like I was when I found out I had to actually interview one of them instead of being amongst hundreds of journos in a big room.

SEX in Byron Bay with the maintenance man

My daughter Dominique and I went to Byron Bay for a holiday last year. My BFF Tania and her daughter Olympia were also staying in Byron. Dom & I stayed at a 5* boutique hotel which only accommodation is Penthouses situated on the beach. Sting had stayed in our penthouse. I don't want to mention the name of the hotel for fear of getting the man in this story the sack.

We check in and I eat one of my 'special' cookies that I have prepared in Melbourne, can't get busted for flying with chocolate chip cookies. Takes an hour to take effect. I'm feeling real good now, sitting on my pink daybed watching the ocean listening to Michael Jackson.

I get bored and want to have a chat to someone other than my daughter, who is constantly telling me how 'inappropriate' I am. I go down to the little reception area to talk to Julie the receptionist, as I'm chatting away, (don't forget I'm stoned from the cookie) I hear a Irish voice from behind her, I say who is that? and a cute guy steps out and says Hi! he has a pink shirt on and shorts. I tell him I love his accent and he is cute. Then I run back upstairs. I tell Dominique, I just saw a spunk, and I forget about him. Short term memory loss is really short term when you are on a cookie.

Next thing Dominique says hello to someone in our suite, it's the maintenance guy, I'm dancing to MJ not taking any notice. Dom says "Mum look he has a tattoo of Marilyn Monroe", I'm like WTF! where? I'm interested again because I have a lot of INK, I ask him where is Marilyn, he shows me, she is on his leg, I'm impressed. A man who is so comfortable with his masculinity that he wears a pink polo shirt and has a full leg of Marilyn on him. We chat and compare INK. I don't even ask why he was in our suite.

Next day Dom & I go to The Balcony, I get drunk on vodka marguritas and eat another cookie. When we return to our hotel, i'm completely out of it, no need to go into the gorey details, but my friend the receptionist and our butler come rushing up, I don't know WTF is going on till i'm told the next day by my daughter.

Apparently I was so fcuked up that I played MJ so loud that everyone in the restaurant below our penthouse had to listen to him for hours. In a 5* place like this you can do just about anything and it's cool because you are paying so much. The reason the staff came running up was because I smashed a glass on the marble floor and it made them think their was a fight happening in our suite. I have no memory of any of this. I was on the floor and they carried me to the bed vomiting as I go. I woke up in a awful mess. Daughter NOT impressed AGAIN!

Next day Dom goes para sailing, it's 10am, i'm feeling good, no hangover because I only drink white spirits. I eat a cookie and wait for it to take effect. OMG! a while later the maintenance man is in my penthouse again, I don't even think this is strange. We start talking, he is only 40 and looks like a cross between a young Paul Hogan and Pierce Brosnan, I tell him this. Somehow we start talking about SEX. I tell him I'm over sex haven't had a fcuk in 10 years. He nearly collapsed, couldn't believe what I was saying. I'm used to it, but obviousely other people think that 10 years is a long time. He immediately says "come on lets do it" I'm like "do what?" i'm 5 minutes behind everything he is saying because I'm really stoned on 2 cookies, a quarter of one of my cookies will put most people in a coma.

After I realise he is serious I say "no way", he insists, I say "let me think about it overnight and I'll tell you tomorrow". He says "NO it has to be now, I don't work tomorrow". He is putting the pressure on and I'm actually thinking, maybe I will. So I did.

Maintenance man bent me over the big black leather chair and gave me a serve, lasted 2 minutes, then everything was back to normal, like nothing had happened. He took off and I was left standing their stunned. I have to share immediately. I ring Tania who is staying near by. I scream I just fcuked the maintenance man, she is in shock. T says me and Limp are on our way over. Dominique arrives back I tell her what I just did, she is not surprised. Tania and Limp arrive and we are all screaming about what has just happened. Laughing hysterically. They want details and my daughter pipes up and says "I hooked mum up with him", I'm like "WTF! are you kidding me Dom" she says "nope dead serious", why do you think I made you look at his Marilyn tattoo, I knew you would be interested after you saw this. She was right, so apart from my random maintenance man who only took 2 minutes on me, I have not had sex in 10 years.

Gene Simmons part two

After leaving Inflation with Gene his face covered with a hankie and four bodyguards, we get in the limo. A bodyguard either side of us, one opposite and one in the passenger seat next to the driver. Now I hate to tell you this, but this was the most exciting part of the evening.

As we pull into the underground car park of the Southern Cross Hotel, hundreds of screaming girls surrounded us. I felt like a pop star for a moment, it was exciting. We get into the hotel and the bodyguards leave Gene and I as we enter his suite.

Now don't forget, if you read my previous Blog I had been sitting on dirty concrete at VFL park watching Kiss perform, I had no knickers on and a very short Jenny Bannister white leather min so I felt filthy.

I say to Gene, I need a shower, he says NO, I say YES, I've been sitting on concrete watching you fly through the air and my bum is dirty. He still says NO. So I'm feeling a bit uncomfortble.

Gene says do I mind if he takes some polaroids of me. So I say sure, but he liked my legs the most so concentrated on the the most, had me bending over the couch and touching my toes, all my junk was exposed. After taking heaps of pics. he wants to get busy.

Now here's a tip for all men. Not every woman likes guys going down on us. At least I don't. He spent what seemed like hours buried in my crotch, all I could see was his long wild hair buried between my legs. I'm soo bored. all I can think about is, a couple of hours ago he was flying through the air spitting fire. Now he is worshiping at my alter.

That finshed we talked and got to know each other a little bit. Found out, he does not do any drugs, or drink alcohol, but loves Horror Movies. We watch a movie. Then get down to what I like, kissing and kissing some more. Yes we closed the deal and he was great.

Next morning Gene want's me to go to Adelaide with him and Kiss, but I can't it's my son Bretts birthday 17 November. I ask Gene to sign something for Brett, which he does. Years later I found out from another Rock God, that to ask for a autograph after fcuking them is an insult, who knew.

I'm sent home in a limo, not to my house but to my mothers so I can pick up Brett. Holy shit, all hell breaks loose. In the backyard is my mum, dad, bro and bloody Pierre, my longtime boyfriend. Bloody Pierre has told them that I ditched him and went off with the guy with the long tongue from Kiss.

My mother and I NEVER got along, both Aries both Dragons. She never had an orgasm in her life, so could never understand why I enjoyed sex. I got called every derogatory name under the sun, a common occurance in my family.

I give Brett his autograph which he proudly takes to school to show his friends. I was a good mum.

Years later I had a fling with a guy from The Scatt Brothers another American band. The photographer on this tour was Bob. He was just a friend. When the band went to leave Oz Bob wanted to stay. As Pierre had moved out, I said he could be my flatmate. Bob was 6'8", red henna hair, covered in tattoos and pierceings, a gentle giant. Bob wore a black satin bomber jacket with 'The Worlds Most Fmous Photographer' on the back.

When Bob left a year later, he got in touch with me to tell me he had just seen some photos of me on Gene Simmons wall. Bob was at Gene's house doing a shoot, and Gene showed him his trophy room with polaroids of all the women he had hooked up with from all over the world. I think it was 3000 women then, now it's up to 8000.

This is just one of my many stories about hooking up with famous Rock Gods, more to follow.

My Rock God experiences!

Since the early 80's when I started my night time career as the first Door Bitch in Melbourne, I had met and fcuked a lot of famous International Rock Stars. My most famous is Gene Simmons from Kiss. BUT, I do have many other famous ones, and some infamous, just got to remember!

Here's a sneek peak at some of my conquests: Simon le Bon 'Duran Duran', Robin Zander 'Cheap Trick', Jim Kerr lead singer Simple Minds, Jon Bon Jovi, shit I can't remember his bands name, i'm stoned! should not have a smoke before I start to write, short term memory loss, shit we could be here all day.

Gene Simmons/KISS adventure down under 1980

My son Brett was a mad Kiss fan, he was 9years old, he died at 21. Brett is pestering me and my long time live in boyfriend Pierre, we had been together for 7 years to take him to a Kizz concert. So of course being a good mum I got tickets for the three of us. It was at a huge football stadium at VFL Park.

Now Pierre and I are well connected in the club scene, we have been running Fantasy parties at Inflation for years, and the gay dances in the 70's Spangles etc. Their is even books with pics about our parties. The books are written by Rennie Ellis, famous pjotographer in Oz, Books are called 'Life's a Ball' Life's a Party' Life's a Beer' etc. I'm in 3 of them all 3 pics have my nipples exposed.

Back to the story, Pierre and I have been invited to a private party at Inflation by the owner Sam which is happening after the Kiss concert. So I'm dressed in my party gear, a Wendy Bannister original white leather mini shirt and top. Jenny had cut the mini while it was on me, thats how Jenny rolls. I never wore underwear, still don't. So Jenny cut the ragged edges of my mini so you could not see my private parts.

I'm sitting on dirty concrete benches at the bloody football park watching Kiss. I'm enthralled by the vision I'm seeing, it was amazing with special effexts, great music and Gene flying through the air breathing fire. It was mesmerising.

Kiss finish, we drive my so to my  mums for her to babysit Brett while we go to this private party at Inflation. Now Pierre and I don't know what this party is for. We arrive downstairs and Sam the owner says, Kizz are coming we have a private party for them on the top floor. Shit, next thing in come Kiss with white hankerchifs over their faces like a cowboy robbing a bank. So I'm checking them out. Body Guards everywhere they each have four. Paul, Ace and the rest of them,I cnt remember their nmes go straight upstairs, not minding that they are pushing in. I see this and think what arseholes, then Gene stops at the bottom of the stairs to let some ladies go first. Now I'm interested. Up we all go to the private room. Kiss are itting on low couches, their eyes are level with my hemline, which is short. I walk through see Molly, and other industry people, I get to the end of the room, so I can survey whats happening, I find it all very boring. So I leave and go into the other room where the food is, no one else is in their. I start to eat, and feel something at my neck, it's Gene reciting poetry in my ear, holy shit, i'm in shock, he is really tall and gorgeous without makeup or a scarf hiding his face. He comments on th music, it's Dianna Ross, Gene says, no matter which country I'm in they will put Diana Ross on because I was dating her till recently. I say what happened, he says he couldn't stand her children, and how he will never have children because he didn't need a replica of him running around. As we all know now he has teo gorgeous children and a beutiful longtime girlfriend/baby manna Shanon Tweed. I wish he would marry her.

Back to story, I start to eat again and ignore him, not intentionally, I was just hungry. Gene pulls me away from the food and says why don't you come back to my hotel because I have everything and anything you could want, especially food. I think, actually I didn't think, just went with the flow. I say lets go!

Its a major 'thing' now the main attraction is about to leave his party, but he has to organise his scarf to hide his face from people & papps, then his 4 body guards. Sam the owner comes over to me and says "WTF? is going on. I say I'm leaving with Gene, he spits chips at me, then Pierre comes over and says what are you doing? I say i'm leaving with Gene, which I did surrounded by four body guards and Gene and me in the middle, we are escorted to the limo, leaving everyone at the party pissed at me. To be continued...

Zanex overdose

Continuation of Amanda's stay in hospital. After giving Amanda one of my Zanex, during the night she has shit herself twice. Don't forget she is in St V's for constipation. Amanda has been taken out of her bed twice without remembering it because she is out of it on my Zanex. Nurses have stripped her bed twice, walked her to the bathroom twice, hosed her down twice and put her back in bed. I'm watching all this from my bed opposite her, thinking OMG what have I done! is she ever gonna wake up! When she eventually sits up in bed her face is all scrunched up, she reaches her hand down to her knickers, which have been replaced by adult diapers and says 'WTF i'm all wet' I tell her what happened during the night and she doesn't believe me. I have actually cured her of her constipation.

Now before I did this to Amanda, I nearly did the same thing to the poor old man in the bed next to me. He had not slept in two nights, so I offer him one of my hidden Zanex, John, that's his name says "oh! I already have some sleeping pills that my son bought in for me". So I tell him to take them, which he does and, guess what he is awake again, they are not Zanex. Now if I hadn't had the experience with Amanda I might have given John one of my Zanex and I might have killed the old guy. So my message is don't share your prescribed meds with anyone but yourself. But if you have severe constipation take a Zanex.

My stay in downtown Bancok Hilton aka St V's hospital

While I was staying at St. V's the guRL in the bed opposite me was curled up in a ball when I was put in her room. All I could see was a bit of black hair sticking out fromunder the white hospital blanket. When she emerged a day later she was doubled up in severe pain. Her name was Amanda, she was a beautiful aboriginal guRL. She had diabettes and severe constipation, a condition that lands her in here at lot. After i introduced myself I saw a flicker of a smile. We became friends. Amanda had the most beautiful 11year old guRL named Jen. Jen is stunning, tall with the most beautiful blue/green eyes and had just had her streaked blonde, She asked me if i knew 'crump' which i said yes, she then preceded to 'crump' for me, Jen was fantastic! She tells me loves Justin Bieber, but can't stand Pink and her song Get this party started. Jen has made up her own words, "stop this bloody party right now" she has me in fits of laughter with her antics. I fall immediately in love with her. Jen is on FB with her mum. Jen likes boxig and would love a pair of hot pink Everlast boxing gloves. Second night and Jen's mum Amanda is in severe pain and can't sleep. Now I have been in at St V's in November and learn't the hard way that if you bring in your own prescribed Zanex they lock it up in their vault and won't give them back till you leave. So this time I hid them in a secet part of my bag. I'm feeling sorry for Amanda because she can't get a good nights sleep. So I offer her one of my Zanex. I thought this would be okay, but I didn;t take into account that Amanda is not used to Zanex. She takes it and goes to sleep. Now I'm awake because they have to put my midnight feed of IV antibiotics in. Nursey is trying to wake up Jen so she can test her finger for her insulen levels, and nursey can't wake Amanda up, now I'm getting worried that I have killed her. More nurses arrive and can't wake Amanda. I pass out from taking my usual 2 zaex plus the 2 the nurses have given me. I can't avoid the nurses dose as they stand in front of me while I take them. Next morning nursey wkes me up for my 0600 feed of antibiotics. Bloody hell Amanda is sill asleep. I'm freaking out, 2 hours later more nurses are trying to wake her, saying well at least she is getting some sleep at last. At 0900 Amanda is moving and trys to sit up, I'm soo happy I haven't killed her. She is totally still out of it. I tell her to get the fcuk up and move around because she has scared me half to death. The nurses come in and help her to the toilet, because because Amanda has slept like the dead she has gone to the toilet in her bed and slept in it all night. What a mess I have created, literally.